Tenika
Crown Heights, BK — 2/28/2024
Author’s note: I met Tenika in the fall of 2023 over dinner at a friend’s house in Crown Heights, Brooklyn.
So, what’s your name?
00;01;13;12
Tenika Smith. Yes, That's an easy one. Good stuff. So, this is usually the part where I fall apart. Yep. Yeah.
Where were you born and where do you live now?
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Born in Perth, Western Australia. I have lived in Melbourne since I was 19, now I have one foot in this country, one foot in Australia. And at some point - I'll jump.
Tenika Smith discusses how she ended an eight-year relationship and marriage in 2023. Amidst this significant life change, armed with a newly acquired green card, she embarked to the United States on a three-month journey of self-reflection and personal growth.
Where do I find you today?
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Where I am today - living in a terrifying freedom, but it's also an exciting freedom. I'm proud of myself and the decisions I've made. It wasn't easy but it wasn't completely impossible.
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I feel like I am meeting a new version of me and part of that new version is also an old version that somehow has been forgotten along the way. All the things that were important to me, particularly creatively, are stirring up again. This new version of me is also a lot more powerful than I used to be.
00;49;53;23
Old me and new me are all coming together at once - and it's quite nice.
How is this period of recalibrating and connecting to your inner child's curiosity?
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I wanted to reconnect with writing while I’ve been here. A friend gave me some advice before I left - “the moment that you're in right now - just capture that. Don't worry about the form. Just capture the lightning in the bottle of what you're experiencing right now.” - That has given me the freedom to explore.
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I felt the weight lift off my shoulders and there was no pressure to achieve anything. I can just write for the sake of writing and that has been joyous. So, I have written shitty poetry and journalling which I've never done in my life, and I've written a play just for the sake of writing, and that has been unreal. It’s been a liberating and explorative time for me.
00;36;17;04
Even if I'm feeling like I don't want to do anything today or feeling a bit stuck - just living in this city, saying yes to the opportunities that arise, and meeting new people; that's all creativity.
Tenika graduated from Australia's Victorian College of the Arts and is an acclaimed filmmaker and director who has been directing Australia’s longest-standing drama, ‘Neighbours,’ since 2018. To give some more perspective - ‘Neighbours’ is the fastest-paced television production in Australia, filming 15 to 17 minutes of screen time in a day, which is 3 to 5 times faster than other production schedules in the genre. So, Tenika is constantly overseeing, directing, and executing a huge team and a beast of a production.
Do you get paralyzed by choice?
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I don't ever really feel that way, I think working on ‘Neighbors’ has sharpened my toolkit to make fast decisions and they're instinctive. The good thing to learn is that you make mistakes along the way and you have to be able to take ownership and go, “You know what, that’s not working…Let's try this.” It’s a collaboration and it’s constant troubleshooting - how are we going to face this challenge or the next and roll with the punches...and there will be punches. It’s a dance.
00;30;40;04
But yeah, there's freedom to make mistakes…in fact, it’s essential you make mistakes as that’s where you learn the most. Through working your way through the challenges. I’ll always be my own harshest critic - but that’s how I become better at my craft and it gives me the drive to improve every day…by going home at the end of the day and reliving every decision I made for better or worse!
If you could give yourself one piece of advice on your first day as a director what it might be?
I would remind myself that how I connect with stories emotionally is the most important aspect because sometimes you can get bogged down in the mechanics of it all, like logistically - how I'm going to film a scene, what’s my coverage, where are the cameras, how long have we got in the schedule for it? There’s potential to be clouded by all these practicalities and find yourself detaching emotionally from what's actually happening in the scene - what story you’re telling.
So - The reminder that everything I do has to be guided by the emotion, the character and the story.
What piece of advice would you give your younger self? The young Tenika frolicking on the beaches of Perth.
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I would tell her to not be afraid of her voice. That is still a work in progress, which is funny because my job is to be the voice and the vision. However, the younger me was very much raised to be kind, polite, and thoughtful, which are all good things and I'm absolutely proud to be those things. But I wasn’t necessarily taught how to take up space. So that's something that I'm still conscious of - my voice and taking up space.
Talk to me about feeling creatively drained. [cont.]
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Just go out and live for a bit, it'll come to you. It can be forced but it's better if it's not. Go to the gallery, absorb and consume and then create. Something will inspire you - there will be a little moment of - awe.
00;37;38;05
I went to MoMA, and after a few hours I found myself in the Monet room with the water lilies and I just started crying. I thought, “Why am I crying?” And then I went to the gift shop and saw this bag, and realized why I started crying - a certain blue entered my soul. And I can’t even describe what that means or why, but you can be inspired by something, by anything, even if you don’t logically understand how it’s affecting you..it’s a feeling. That doesn't mean that I'll write something profound about it, but the process of creating and consuming - it's all connected.
What's does love mean to you?
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I think it's the meaning of life. I am overflowing with love for my friends right now. I think that the meaning of life is to love in all of its forms, so it's integral to how we survive.
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Lately, I’ve been focused more on what a partnership means, and less on [romantic] love. My friend went through a breakup about ten years ago and I remember this so clearly - her boss said to her, “Life is going to be challenging. It's only going to get harder and things will be thrown at you. Parents will die. Sickness, mortgages, children - you're going to go through a storm. You need someone who is going to protect you through that.”
How do you navigate regret?
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I try to learn from them - What could I do differently the next time I'm faced with this scenario? I think that's important. But also, particularly in this period of my life, I'm trying to practice forgiveness and that means a lot of self-forgiveness too. It's like the Maya Angelou quote - “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.”
00;56;13;16
I try not to get into the mindset of ‘well, if I didn't make this decision, what would have happened?’ Because it would unravel my entire life. It is what it is - Maybe I made mistakes, maybe I can learn from them. I can't go back and change it. This thing led to that which led to the best thing. I’ve got a lot to be grateful for so I don’t want to unravel any of it.
“I have to remind myself - the job that I have is the best job in the world. I’m literally getting paid to play make-believe for a living. Like that’s ridiculous. It’s surreal that someone would pay me to do that.”